The Broken Girl (Lonely Girl Book 2) Read online

  The Broken Girl

  Lonely Girl Series

  By Gracie Wilson

  All Becca Potts seems to know is darkness, pain and loss.

  Every time she gets ahead another secret or event sends her spiraling back.

  Dillon's attack has left her fighting for all she holds dear.

  Now she has to be brave and pick up the pieces.

  Hearts will be shattered and love will be rewritten.

  Becca has to navigate through the chaos that is plaguing her life and figure out what she wants.

  Nothing is going as planned but it never has.

  Everything she thought she knew is about to be challenged.

  Truths will be exposed.

  New threats will be revealed.

  Promises will be destroyed and life as Becca knows it is about to be broken.

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events or locales is entirely coincidental.

  Copyright © 2014 by Gracie Wilson

  Published by Beau Coup Publishing

  http://beaucoupllc.com

  Cover model: Paige Simone

  Cover by JRA Stevens

  For Beau Coup Publishing

  ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. This book contains material protected under International and Federal Copyright Laws and Treaties. Any unauthorized reprint or use of this material is prohibited. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system without express written permission from the author / publisher.

  Chapter One

  You’d think after all the heartbreak that I have been through, I’d have handled those three little words better. I will admit I didn’t and I’m not proud of that fact. Rushing up to the room was the most exciting moment in what seemed like a daze of devastations. After Michael’s death, I’d closed myself off and only really opened up again to family. Except for Keegan and Jake so you can imagine the way I’m feeling, after everything that’s happened in the last year. Dillon had tried to kill me. Now I believe he’d tried multiple times. He had failed, but not at the expense of others. It was bad enough that he was behind the accident that killed Michael. But it was still an accident, something I have come to realize and adjust to. He was just a scared kid who’d run a car off the road.

  The events that followed that accident are unforgivable though. Even though Michael had slept with his girlfriend, it would never excuse the fact that Dillon had indeed sought me out to get back at Michael for that. He had intentionally gone out of his way to devastate me by telling me that the incident occurred while I was with Michael. Since Michael had died in the accident he had no way to take anything from him, other than the fact he’d already taken his life. Apparently, that wasn’t enough. He wanted more twisted justice. So I became his new obsession. When I say obsession, I mean that in the most real way. What I hadn’t known until after I’d been in the hospital a few days was that Dillon was actually sick. He was struggling with mental illness.

  His mother had asked my parents to speak with me. She assured them she didn’t blame me and that she had tried to get a handle on him. After he took off, they couldn’t find him. She told me she’d tried multiple times to have him committed, but this was not an easy task to do without his consent. She cried and begged me to forgive her and to try and remember him before the accident. Before that fateful accident that had triggered something neither of us knew would go this far. With one dead, myself having to be stitched up due to the damage Dillon inflicted on me, and another two in the hospital in critical condition, it’s a hard subject to purposely ponder. I remember Dillon before the accident with Michael. He was always nice and carefree. I know most people would think I’m making excuses, but I know that he is sick. For that alone, I can reason with the fact I’m now standing where I am.

  It’s the day of the funeral and my heart hurts in ways I never expected. I hadn’t gone to Michael’s funeral and I knew I had to do this even though some wouldn’t understand. Staring at the casket as the priest talks about his life, love of sports, and the love of his friends and loved ones, I see the family look to me with pity. I stand there next to Alec, who has his arm around my shoulder, holding me protectively. He doesn’t let me out of his sight now even though I’ve told him it’s over and I’m safe. But to him, all he will remember is pulling up in his car only to find me being rushed into the hospital from the ambulance. I was barely awake and I was in shock. I hadn’t needed any surgery, but I’d still been kept in the hospital a few days.

  When the service finishes, I walk up to put a flower on his casket and my brother follows me do the same. When we are heading back to the car with my parents, the phone call from the hospital comes in. They are calling to tell us that Keegan has woken up. They’ve kept him sedated to rest and recuperate in a medically induced coma. They’d started to wean him off and now he’s awake. I don’t wait, I hop in the car and pretty much yell at everyone else to get in. I’m driving this time and my family is shocked. The funeral was only an hour out of Thunder Bay so we make it back to the hospital quickly. I rush up to the floor, bolting past the nurses towards his room at a ridiculous speed. All I keep thinking is Keegan’s awake; I haven’t lost another person I love. Nothing, however, prepared me for what happened when I rushed into the room and hug Keegan.

  He looks confused and pulls back from me, looking towards my brother who has rushed in behind me. He looks so lost that I wonder if he hates me, preferring I leave and not be here with him right now. If it weren’t for me, he wouldn’t be in this situation and he wouldn’t be lying in this bed. I go to tell him I will leave if he wants me to, but the words that come out of his mouth leave me speechless.

  “Who are you?”

  I feel my breath being sucked out of me and I feel my brother’s hand on my back supporting me. “Key, do you know who I am?” My brother looks like he’s just as lost as I am. When he gets his response, he seems to look like he saw a ghost.

  “What the hell is wrong with you, Alec? Of course I know who you are.”

  I begin to think he was just screwing with me, but he still looks at me as if he really doesn’t know who I am.

  “Keegan, man, you really don’t know who this is?” He’s pointing to me and I can see Keegan trying to figure it out in his head. He shakes his head in defeat and I feel my heart shatter. “Keegan this is my sister, remember?” I see his eyes light up and I get hopeful.

  “Oh, shit! Of course it is. I’m sorry you just look so different from the pictures I’ve seen. Thanks for coming, Bec.” I feel my stomach start to contract and I put my hand over my mouth to stop the limited contents in my stomach from coming up. He called me Bec, not Becca. Keegan looks confused and it’s upsetting him because his monitors start to go crazy. “Keegan, what’s the last thing you remember?”

  Keegan stays quiet for a minute, clearly trying to pick his last memory from his scattered mind. “Christmas, you got me that amazing poster of that bulldog on a skateboard.” At the word Christmas I stop until I realize my brother hadn’t gotten him that, at least not this past Christmas.

  “That was a year and a half ago, Key.” I see Keegan struggling to catch his breath and I want to go to him but he doesn’t even know who I am.

  “Maybe we shouldn’t be doing this now Alec, let’s just go get the doctors and we can talk about this all together.” I see my voice snap him out of his episode and bring him back to reality.

 
“But why is your sister here and why are you acting so strange about this?”

  He says ‘your sister’ and I think my heart is completely broken. Clearly I was wrong. I just didn’t know it yet.

  “Man, she’s sort of your girlfriend. Has been for a while.” The shock in his eyes at the words my brother has just stated feels like a knife being put through me. Trust me. I’d know. Right now I’d gladly take that real knife over this.

  “You’re screwing with me! What happened to me and Sarah?” My breath is sucked out of me, causing me to get dizzy. “Wait, was I in an accident?” My brother goes over everything again. The nurse soon comes in and he explains everything to her. I haven’t said a word and, in all honesty, I wouldn’t know what to say. Keegan looks at me and I wish I’d see a spark of recognition, but I don’t. All I see is utter confusion. “So I guess I’m dating Bec Potts now.”

  I tense and my brother goes to grab for me. I shake my head and back away. “I’m going to go get us all some food. I’ll be back.” I rush out the room, leaving my brother there, and I run to the lobby. I sit in a chair, just wishing I’d wake up from this nightmare.

  “Becca! Oh my god, Becca!” I look up and see Charlotte running up to me from the front doors. I don’t get up, I just sit here as she collapses next to me holding me. “I’m so sorry I missed the funeral, Becca. My flight was delayed. I was trying to get here to be with you.” I look confused. I didn’t even know she was coming. “I wanted to surprise you, something happy you could have, and you need some of that right about now.”

  She has no idea how true her words were. “Why aren’t you upstairs? I heard the great news from your parents when they called me after I landed.” I hadn’t even thought to call my parents and let them know that Keegan didn’t remember the last year and a half of his life.

  “I can’t be up there. It’s too hard.” I feel her tighten around me.

  “Becca, it will all be okay. I know you have a huge thing to work out involving your love life but it will be alright I promise.”

  I shake my head so vigorously it might pop off. “I wish that were true but nothing will be the same again.” I begin to weep in my cousin’s arms.

  “Oh no, Becca, this isn’t like with Michael. It’s going to be alright.”

  I say the words for the first time that leave me entirely heartbroken. “He doesn’t remember me, Charlotte. He doesn’t remember anything about me but that I’m Bec, from the photos in Alec’s dorm, Alec’s little sister. Worse, he thought he was still with that bitch Sarah.” I get up and take off, I can’t talk about this anymore. I have to go, I need to be where I feel safe.

  Charlotte didn’t try to stop me when I left. She knew I just couldn’t deal and had to get away. I can’t keep doing this; I can’t keep living this life. Not like this, not without Michael, Keegan, and Jake. I just know I’m not that strong.

  I’m standing outside Keegan’s door and I see the nurse come by. “Hi, sweetie, you going in?” I nod but by my expression is somber. She just puts her hand on my shoulder. “He can get through it. With a pretty girl like you there’s no way he’s not coming through this. He’s going to move on from all of it and you will remember this as something that bonded you.” My heart is wishing I could believe her, but without me in his life Keegan wouldn’t be lying in this hospital bed. I walk through the door, seeing him bruised less than the day before, but he still isn’t the same. Seeing his bandages, it makes my heart sink. Walking up and sit on the bed with him, willing him to open his eyes with my mind. So I bring my legs up to line up with his so we are lying parallel in the hospital bed. Putting my head on his chest, careful not to cause him any more pain. I’ve done enough of that already. The tears begin to fall and I turn into his arms. “Jake, please wake up.”

  Chapter Two

  Lying in the bed with Jake was the only place I felt safe or normal. Jake was the one person I knew would always understand me. When Jake was brought in after Dillon’s attack, he was rushed into surgery and kept in the ICU. His grandmother had come because we called her. I was listed as his next of kin for some odd reason, which permitted me to be on the floor with him. When I called her, she already knew all about me. I explained what had happened in some detail, skipping the parts she didn’t need to know. She came down to the hospital, but told me that he was in amazing hands. His grandmother asked me to call if anything changed. When I asked if we should call any other family, she told me if that’s what he had wanted I wouldn’t have been the one listed as next of kin. She was an amazingly wild and hilarious woman. As soon as I was released, I spent every night sleeping in his room with him. At the beginning, I’d rest in a chair that pulled out next to him. Slowly, as he healed from his surgeries, I ended up in the bed with him. “Jake, I need you. You promised you’d always be here.”

  I hold on to Jake, wishing my proximity could wake him from this. When I was in the hospital after the attack from Dillon last time, Jake pulled me out. “I heard you the whole time, Jake. When you talked to me when I was sleeping. So I’m going to talk to you every day and hopefully you will be hearing me.” I snuggle into him, ready to bare my soul. “Jake, I love you. Not like you love me, though. When we were here, you said you loved me but you’re not in love with me. I couldn’t admit it then but I loved you. I’m in love with you, but I will always be your best friend first. I will put aside my feelings so that I can always be your best friend and be here for you, no matter the cost. Without you I’d be lost. If you don’t wake up, I just can’t… I won’t survive.” I hear a shuffle and look up to see my brother Alec watching me.

  “Becca. It will be okay. Jake is just resting. His body needs it just like you did when it was you lying here and Jake begging you to wake up.” He looks like he wants to say something more but isn’t sure what I can handle.

  “What is it, Alec?”

  He looks at me, trying to scale my emotions before continuing. “I know you are in love with Jake. I think I knew before you knew. I know you love Keegan too, but your going to have to choose one day. For the record though, I was here when Jake was making the same plea to wake you up. He’s in love with you too, Becca. He’s just scared of losing you if you don’t choose him. If I was him, I’d rather have you in my life as my friend than not at all” I’m shocked by this because Jake has continually told me we are just friends. Could he have been hiding it just like I was?

  Alec continues, “Keegan will remember you. Who, by the way, is asking to see you.” I look to Jake and want to tell Alec to tell him I’m busy, but I’d hate to be in his position. I think of the difficulty of trying to pick up pieces of my life that I couldn’t remember. I turn to Jake and give him a gentle kiss on his lips. “Jake, I’ll be back. I love you, so please come back to me.”

  My brother walks me to the door of Keegan’s room and I stop before I go in. “I can’t do this.” I turn to run away, but my brother doesn’t let me.

  “I’m going to go spend some time with Jake. You need to talk to Keegan. Even with all his screw-ups, he was a good friend to you. I don’t know how I feel about you being with him, after learning the truth while you were gone, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want you to make your own choice. I will not stop you from whoever that is, as long as they take care of you. I’m done trying to control your life and make sure it’s perfect. Instead, I’m going to help you keep your secrets, if that’s what you need, or I’ll be the big brother who kicks some ass. Whatever it is. That’s me now, okay, Becca?” I nod and hug him before turning around and walking through those doors to Keegan.

  Seeing Keegan is the best and worst thing all at once. I see in his eyes that he doesn’t remember me and our connection is gone, although I still feel this guilt to stick by him. Even after everything that’s happened with Sarah. He needs me right now and, if he’ll let me, I will help him through this. If he doesn’t remember me, I could remember for the both of us, as friend or as more. But I feel that it should be his choice. Until he’s back on h
is feet and we see how this goes, I will play the amazingly supportive girlfriend even though I’m not sure if I want to be with him at all. I can’t exactly dump my boyfriend when he needs me. What does that make me? So if I leave it up to him, I might not feel this guilt. “Hello, Bec.” Every time he says that name, it feels like it slices into my heart. He’s never called me Bec, and to hear it shows how much I don’t mean to him anymore. Friend or otherwise.

  “Becca. It’s Becca.” I say it sweetly but I see by his eyes that he’s wondering if I’m upset with him.

  “Sorry, I talked with your brother a bit and he did mention that. Must have forgotten.” I have this innate urge to laugh. By the smirk on his face, he does too. So we both laugh.

  It feels nice to laugh with him again, to move past our history. “So, I’m confused as to how we met and also about what happened with Sarah.” Hearing her name brings back the night that Keegan and I had sex for my first and only time. Hearing him say goodnight to her led me to flee in the first place.

  “I’m not sure what happened with Sarah. I’m assuming you and my brother lied to me. I came here in the spring and we met because you roomed together. I had a boyfriend, kind of, at the time.” He nods his head to acknowledge me.

  “Yes, Dillon, Alec told me everything that went down with him. He is one sick son of a bitch.” I walk over and sit next to the bed in the chair.

  “Was. He was one and yes, he was sick, mentally speaking. He just couldn’t get the help he needed.” I explain.

  Keegan turns to me and I already know what he’s going to ask. “Was?”

  I haven’t had to say it out loud yet but I know I can. “Yes, I killed him in self defense. He won’t be hurting anyone else again. As for Sarah, I don’t know. You will have to ask Alec.” I change the subject because I just don’t want to talk about Dillon anymore. “When I showed up for school, we started to get close. You and my brother told me that Sarah was a summer fling. But since you don’t remember the summer I guess that was a lie. I only found out it was more than that after a fight when you slipped up and told me in a voicemail while you were half-drunk, right before our accident. But I started to move away and make my own friends because of the emotions involved with our friendship and because Sarah was still around. You couldn’t let that happen or at least that’s what you told me. Sarah caused problems and we let her. We got together and have had some issues, but we were trying to figure it out. Last thing you had said was that you loved me and we would fix this. I’m not holding you to any of this since you don’t even know me to love me at all. I just need you to be okay, Keegan. Before we were together, we were very close friends. That, I will hold you to.” I smile, hoping he gets what I’m saying and he gives me a small smile too.